Bucket ’22 Winner of Egg Contest To Become New Owner of WesWings

As many probably figured out, our recent Egg Hunt had several eggs containing “Golden Tickets” We invited all of the ticket holders to a tour of WesWings and we are happy to announce that pre-frosh Charles Bucket ’22 was the winner. Not just of the cookie dough, but the whole restaurant.

We chose Charlie despite his breaking the rules of the contract signed by him.

“the undersigned, shall forfeit all rights, privileges, and licenses herein and herein contained, et cetera, et cetera… Fax mentis incendium gloria cultum, et cetera, et cetera… Memo bis punitor delicatum!”

During the tour, he and his grandpa Joe stole some Dr Pepper by drinking directly from the soda fountain which now has to be washed and sterilized. But instead of getting nothing and saying good day to them, after Bucket ’22 returned his everlasting cookie dough we knew he was the one.

We want to also congratulate the other golden ticket winners who took the tour of Swings but didn’t make it to the end, Salt ’18, (was a bad egg), Argus food editor Beauregarde ’19, film student Teavee ’19 and that August kid. Don’t worry they’ll all be back to their normal old terrible selves but maybe they’ll be a little bit wiser for the wear.

Bucket ’22 will be living in 156 High St next year along with his mother and all four grandparents (we don’t know what happened to the father). However due to Res Life rules, all four grandparents will have to share a twin XL bed.